Reflections of Beryl by Ken Smith
Beryl told me some years ago that I would be here today-I’m pretty certain she said “Make ‘em Laugh”
In June 1968 Beryl typed a letter to me as the Headmaster’s secretary at Ixworth Secondary school, welcoming me to the staff and inviting me to visit. I can still remember that first visit, the warm welcome Beryl gave me and the way she chatted to me as though she had known me all my life as she showed me round the school for my first teaching job. From that day began a friendship that was to last for 52 years. Throughout Beryl always smiled a lot, was enthusiastic & fun to be with.
As school secretary Beryl was very professional - anything confidential she was told stayed with her and was never repeated. It was a rare quality that I have always admired.
She was a good typist but it is fair to say she took a while to master the new technology. In about 1980 the school got its first computer and I got the job of explaining to her how to use it. I remember that day she was entering pupil names & addresses in but because the reset button kept flashing and it annoyed her – so she pushed it! She lost a couple of hours but learned a valuable lesson!
The funniest incident was when I had asked her if she could order some more floppy disks. I passed her office door to hear her arguing with a salesman that she wanted ‘fluffy’ disks because she was convinced that was what I had asked for. We have often laughed about that incident.
Now the music teacher was not that popular with the kids. He would play a lot of heavy classical music to his classes - which was not to their liking. A few weeks ago Beryl and I had a good laugh about the notice I found on his door one breaktime, written by an older student. It read ‘torture chamber’. We were laughing not just because of what the notice said but the fact that I did not remove it!
I usually took the Friday assembly for the older pupils and I needed someone to play the hymns. Not wanting to use the music teacher I asked Beryl if she would play for us and she was thrilled. She told me once how much she enjoyed doing that. She would go into the hall early and play some gentle music as the children came in - it had a calming influence on them. I see in the order of service that later we will hear “One more step”. It was one hymn that the youngsters would sing with gusto and a great favourite of hers. We often sang it, but it was more poignant at the final assembly when the kids were leaving our school – so it is a really appropriate to hear that today.
Although Beryl got confused at times in later life, she had a good memory for things that had happened years before at school. Sometimes she would remind me of an assembly I had led and surprise me by asking me to tell her the assembly about Freddie the frog or the one about chopsticks– I couldn’t believe she still remembered them!
Early on in my career I was asked to keep an eye on a troublesome boy in my form. Peter was, I suppose, a naughty boy, but not nasty. He had a difficult homelife, was insecure and in many ways was his own worst enemy! He often courted trouble and knew how to wind up some teachers and did a pretty good job of upsetting larger, stronger lads at school. Beryl felt sad for that boy because of his circumstances. On those days I was called upon to rescue him from a situation I would take him down to her office and she would decide he was unwell and remove him to the safety of the medical room. It may surprise you to know that on more than one occasion, when I went back later to see if Peter had calmed down, I would find him sitting between Beryl and the nurse laughing – You see Beryl had popped down to the village to buy a treat. So there sat all three of them enjoying an ice cream. That was the sort of kind-hearted person Beryl was.
In 2011 Beryl was honoured by the Bishop as an unsung hero for her dedication to church life. She was invited to have tea at his house. At the time she was 90 and had recently retired as churchwarden here at Rickinghall. At the time when she was interviewed Beryl said: “In my teens I was a Sunday school teacher, that's where it all started.”
You have already heard about her being organist in this Benefice but when our organist in Hinderclay decided she couldn’t play any more Beryl, who had played at Hinderclay many years before, agreed to play for two services each month. In earlier days, before Hinderclay was given the organ from Rickinghall Superior church, Beryl used to play the harmonium in our church. When her back was bad she would get Andrew to pump the air by working the pedals for her whilst crouching down under the keyboard! She often told me of the time a spider appeared between the keys & she screamed! And the time she was sucking aniseed sweets during a sermon & was embarrassed when the bag fell over and the round sweets rolled along the nave!
Until she became unwell in 2012 she continued to play for us. Her only problem was remembering how many verses she had already played. She didn’t want to play one verse too many or one too few.
She had an arrangement with our Erick. When she was finishing what she thought was the penultimate verse she would look at him & he would indicate how many verses were left or shake the palms of his hands to tell her to stop. Just over a month ago she confided in me that sometimes she would pretend to begin an extra verse, just to see the look of horror on his face and to see him wave!
It was always a joy to visit Beryl. She was one of those people who never complained and was always happy, cheerful and pleased to see you. “How are you” I would ask to which she always reply “I’m fine – how about you – tell me what’s going on in the village.”
During any visit it was not long before she would want to reminisce about our happy days at Ixworth and she derived much pleasure from re-living the funny incidents we both remembered.
She considered she was really blessed to spend her last years at Walcott Hall. She loved her room, its view and the staff who cared for her. She counted herself very lucky to be cared for there.
Beryl was a spiritual woman who had an unshakable Christian faith. Each day she would read her bible and say her prayers and daily she tried to live out in practice what she believed in her heart.
She was happy to learn from other Christian churches as well. We were reminded earlier that at the age of 8 Beryl made a personal vow to be open minded towards spirituality and religion so it was not surprising that at times she would attend meetings at the White Eagle Lodge, whose philosophy is based on profound universal spiritual truths to encourage a path of love, tolerance and develop an inner peace. Many of us joked with her that during her lifetime she was covering all options for eternity by worshipping with the Anglicans, Catholics, Methodists and some of the Free Churches. She enjoyed the joke! As Nigel told us she was educated in a convent and really loved the sisters. She was always sad that having attended a convent school, her father, whom she idolised, would not allow her to become a Roman Catholic. She never understood why he objected, and it saddened her and as she grew older it troubled her in her mind and soul.
And so she derived great comfort in the last few years of her life when, at her request, Father David agreed to visit her to discuss the Catholic faith. Over a period of time she decided she wanted to realise that childhood dream. And so several of us attended a special service for her to become a bona-fide Catholic at Sir Henry Morse Catholic Church in Diss on Saturday, 7 January 2017. She felt it completed her spiritual journey.
During her last days here on earth, her faith was a great comfort to her and she often asked people to pray for her. She was surrounded by her children in those final days which must have brought her much comfort and joy. The carols, hymns and psalms which were played to her would have helped her find peace.
She truly believed she was on a journey to heaven and said she had the experience of feeling her soul leaving her earthly body.
In closing I think she would like me to tell you this short story:
When I was 5 years old my dear mother took me by the hand and reluctantly I went with her to start at my primary school. I did not want to go and I don’t think she wanted me to leave her either. When we arrived I cried. I was picked up and handed over to my lovely reception class teacher Miss Allen and my mother looked at her to say “this is my son, whom I have loved and cared for every day of his life since he was born. I am giving him to you and I am going to trust you to love and care for him. And with that my mother turned and rushed home in tears. In a way we are doing something similar today. We are saying to God “We have brought our dear Beryl here today, with whom we have laughed, cried, loved and cared for over the past years. We can be with her no more. So today we have brought her here to give her back to you, placing her into your everlasting arms, and we are trusting you to love and care for her for all eternity. AMEN
Your Dear Friend Ken Smith
